Puro Pedo Magazine

Bryant lets down entire Latino community. By Tezozomoc Vasquez
Puro Pedo Magazine
March 25, 2007
LOS ANGELES — There went all of our hopes and dreams.

His streak of 50 or more points in a game is over. Tonight, a dejected Kobe Bryant could only muster a mere 43. As the final buzzer sounded, Luke Walton could only blame himself for letting his teammate down. “I only had 8 assists tonight. I should have gotten him the ball more. I hope the fans will forgive me…I just didn’t bring enough tonight.”

Kobe had scored at least 50 points in four straight games to become the second player in NBA history with such a streak, joining the late Wilt Chamberlain. Wilt’s record streak stands at seven games. If Kobe had come through tonight, he would have needed only two more consecutive 50 point games to tie the record and take his proper seat among the NBA immortals.

Also, many Latino Lakers fans had looked forward to this day as the Lakers honored the Latino community with a daylong celebration. The Lakers not only held a “Fiesta Lakers” celebration earlier in the day but also wore a “Noche Latina” patch on their uniforms. Their uniforms were also ringed with flags from 21 Latin American countries. Ironically, just like legendary Latino boxer, Robert Duran, Kobe finally said “no mas” tonight.

The flags from 21 Latin American countries adorned Lakers uniforms.

The loud cheers from the thousands of Latino fans in attendance may have added extra pressure to perform well on the court. “Today was a bad day for the fellas not to have enough cojones out there,” said Lakers coach, Phil Jackson. “Kobe should know better. His wife, Vanessa, is a Latina. I’m sure this was not mucho bueno for her to watch either.”

Lakers forward, Kwame Brown added to the effort by contributing in his usual way – dropping several passes en route to 5 turnovers. This time, though, he offered a reasonable explanation. “I guess I enjoyed the Fiesta Lakers party too much. I had so many delicious tacos and flautas…my hands were just too oily from all the lard.”

Lakers fans march in honor of Fiesta Lakers Day.

That admission did little to comfort some Lakers fans. “Latinos are the majority in LA, ” said Lakers fan, Marcos Torres. “The Lakers finally represent for us and this is how they show it? That’s all the Latino community needs…to be remembered for ruining Kobe’s 50 point game streak on Noche Latina!”

However, the news was especially difficult for a newly formed Lakers fanclub – The Kobe 50 and Over Streakers. “Kobe had given meaning to our lives, ” said Todd Gundsan, club founder. “With the streak now over, what are we supposed to proudly display our nakedness for? I guess I nicknamed my guy down there ‘Black Mamba’ for nothing!”

Members of The Kobe 50 and Over Streakers watch the game from a local bar.

Lamar Odom had 24 points and 19 rebounds to match his career high. “All season long, I have been a good teammate and passed the ball to Kobe,” explained Odom. “I can’t believe I decided to start being selfish today of all days! I just don’t know what I was thinking out there.”

Kobe Bryant could not be reached for comment. In other league news, the Lakers (38-32) won their fifth straight and eighth in a row, 115-113, over the Golden State Warriors.

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