Puro Pedo Magazine

Back by popular demand, New Age Industries announced that they will be teaming with Good Vibration to unveil “The Native Pleasures Collection,” a new line of authentic Native American sex toys. ”After publishing our best selling book “Vision Quest for Dummies” commented New Age Industries CEO Dick Hertz “we weren’t sure what we could do next to exploit, I mean, celebrate, Native American culture. We figured, since Indians were such earthy and savage people, the next logical step was to release a line of sex toys. ”

This exciting new line of adult toys and novelties include:

*Jade Plugs 2-pack (their not just for your ears anymore),
*The Tochtli (this rabbit keeps going and going and going),
*The Tekpatl fleshlight (try not to cut yourself).
* …and lastly you can play it safe with atl lube and a 12 pack of Jaguar Warrior Condoms.

With every purchase of $45 dollars or more, New Age Industries will give you a copy of their handbook “Sex the Native Way” featuring a step by step quide to those difficult positions such as the “spread cuahtli,” and “esquintle style. “ According to Hurtz, the latest offering is just the tip of the Iceburg “wait’ll you see the Piece of Ass Pipe….it will blow your mind!”

¡Feliz Navidad y Prospero Año Nuevo!

We are excited to celebrate the end of another year and glorious decade!

As we come together with our families for the holidays and sit by the fire with our tamales and champurrado, let’s remember the less fortunate… students! As the cost of an education continues rise and quality lags, Raza students pay the highest price, especially those who are undocumented.

We don’t take much seriously, but access to education is up there with finding a decent taco truck. Puro Pedo Magazine teamed up with Adelante California, Mi Vida and the Special Brownies Art Collective to host another art show fundraiser. All money raised from ticket sales and 50% of art work sales will be donated to the Adelante California scholarship foundation. Any student — regardless of citizenship status — is eligible to apply for Adelante California’s scholarships. This month’s art show will be held on Saturday December 19th at Mi Vida in South Pasadena. Next year, we’ll host two additional shows in Oxnard and Downtown LA. Hopefully our efforts will help to make another students dream a reality.

Last, have you done all holiday shopping yet? If not, don’t worry and make sure to hit up your local grassroots anti-mall or tianguis. Stock up on Frida nichos, jade earrings and Virgen de Guadalupe tin arte.

Hopefully Los Tres Reyes Magos bring you some feria to pay for those tuition increases!

The Puro Pedo Magazine team

Sunnyville seems like a page out of a Norman Rockwell painting. The small town hosts many craft fairs, mom and pop shops and is home to openly gay couple Luis Ortega and Gabriel Nuñez. While they share a wonderful life together something was missing.

“Adoption has been our dream since we started dating five years ago,” said Ortega.

However, the couple says they “really can’t stand kids.”

So, why adopt? The openly gay couple hopes to adopt a highway.

“We used to drive by the highway adoption signs everyday on our commute to work and dream that one day our names could be on one of those signs” says Nuñez.

When the couple were contacted last year about a highway that had become available for adoption they were completely head over heels with excitement. Sadly, they received a phone call last month notifying them that their application for adoption had been denied because of their “lifestyle.”

According to the Sunnyville Center for Highway Adoption, Ortega and Nuñez’ adoption application was denied due to pressure from a local anti-gay rights group.

Harold Henderson, spokesman of the Rainbow Alliance Against Fruity Things (RAAFT), said ,“gays are ruining the rich fabric of our small town. If we let gays adopt highways who’s to say our highways won’t turn out gay?”

Many Conservatives feel that allowing Gay highway Adoption would lead to the deterioration of the fabric of our roads resulting in more potholes and cracks. Gay rights advocates disagree and cite the many roads and highways who could benefit from many gay couples with the love in their hearts to adopt them.

20 Signs You Have Been Se-douched

1. He’s using more hair products than you.
2. His belt buckle is bigger than your purse
3. His shirt looks bedazzled
4. He is obsessed with UFC
5. He wears Tag body spray
6. He sports a Bret Michaels Bandana
7. He is either wearing a TapouT or Affliction shirt
8. He can’t resist throwing up the “Shocker” in photos
9. He has a spray on tan
10. He Calls everyone “Brah”
11. He thinks it’s okay to wear a bandana as a bracelet
12. He has a permanent lemon face
13. He wears dog tags but has never served in the armed forces
14. He wears guyliner
15. He wears a studded belt
16. He leaves trimmed pubes on your bathroom floor
17. He’s a trust fund baby
18. He has traditional tattoos on his shirt and tribal tattoos on his arm
19. He has highlights in his hair
20. His favorite song is whatever the DJ is playing

Answers at the bottom!!

1. Cheech’s moustache
2. The first lighter shade of brown CD
3 Sonia Sotomayor’s Gavel
4. Cheech and Chong’s Up in Smoke Van
5. Slater’s mullet
6. Gerardo’s leather jacket and bandana
7. Ritchie Valens rattle snake necklace
8. Chespirito’s barrel
9. Selena’s purple sparkly jumpsuit
10. Chavo del Ocho’s suspenders
11. Rudy Acuna’s sunglasses
12. Mousie and Sad Girl’s Friendship
13. Miklo’s leg
14. Jaime Escalante’s combover
15. Sharkira’s brown hair
16. Bob’s awesomeness
17. George Lopez’ Kidney
18. Erick Estrada’s motorcycle defaced by George Lopez
19. Edward James Olmos’s zoot suit
20. Frida Kahlo’s unibrow